Fitness Test Results
Jul 29, 2010

Hey guys! So the first two weeks of my new job has been a bunch of classes and lots of learning. Today was Fitness Day.

We had to go through our entire fitness training regimen to get a feel for our starting point. Here is how I did:

# of Push-Ups in 2 minutes: 18
# of Sit-Ups in 2 minutes: 25
Timed 2 mile run: 21:04

Overall, I am pleased with my results, but I still have a lot of work to do. I especially need to focus on getting my sit-ups higher and running lower than 19 minutes. I'm not too far away and I know that if I work really hard I will be there in no time. Our next fitness test is September 24 and I will do better then!

Anyways, this week has been so long I am glad it is almost over. I love my new job and I am really excited to get back on track with fitness!! Hope all is well with everyone :)

The First Weigh-In...
Jul 19, 2010

Well well well the dreaded first weigh in did not go too well. But it did go exactly how I expected it to.

I knew that I had gained all of the weight I had lost previously back. But nevertheless it sucks to realize you've gone 2 pounds past what your heaviest weight was :(

But even though it was a really REALLY scary number for me, it was also the third wake-up call. I don't want that number to go any higher than what it is right now.

I weighed myself first thing this morning and that has motivated me to make healthier choices throughout the day. I swapped green tea for soda and I only had one helping of dinner! All I drank today was water and green tea.

Tomorrow will be great. I am going to pack my lunch before I head out to work so that I am sure to stay on track.

As for right now, I am heading to my basement/weightroom to do some weight training and then I am going to hit the treadmill for some sprints.

Then after all that, I am going to hit the sheets!

Sweet dreams everyone! Keep up all of your hard work :)

BROKEN RECORDS & EPIPHANIES
Jul 17, 2010

"I hate the way my weight makes me feel��"insecure, gross, unworthy, embarrassed, stressed, weak. I don’t want it to control my life anymore! I want to control my life. I need to claim what is mine again. I need this for me. I need this for my future. I need to feel good and healthy again."


So it has been such a long time. So long, in fact, that I needed a wake up call (or 2) to get my ass in gear. Let me bring you all up to date with everything...

WAKE UP CALL #1--The Meltdown
So I had been going about my usual unhealthiness, having a grand ol' time just eating my little heart out and being a big couch potato when it hit me: I am breaking every promise I ever made to myself. It started with an email from my new boss from my new job. She sent me a tentative schedule of the first 2 weeks at my new job. Week number two horrified me: a FITNESS TEST. My jaw drops to the floor and I have a mini heart attack (partly because of what I was eating, the other part being the fitness test). The fitness test is not what surprised me. I surprised myself. I have let myself gain everything that I lost back. I had lost 15 pounds on my last health kick and gained enormous amounts of confidence, yet I stopped doing what was good and right and healthy. I started crying because I remembered how good I felt when I was healthier, how proud I felt. And more than anything, I felt ashamed for quitting, for proving the naysayers right and myself wrong. No one likes to fail...yet I did and I hadn't cared for 6 months until the fitness test smacked me hard across the face. I wouldn't be ready for it, I knew that much. I was absolutely heart broken thinking of what could have been. What I could have been. Where I would be if I hadn't stopped. Happy. I cried and cried and cried. And when I thought I was done crying, I cried some more. I cried until my mom had to comfort me. We talked for hours about everything. About my goals for myself and what she wants for me in life. And how I can still have it. My mom saved me. I was going down a bad road a only a couple of weeks ago, but my mom saved me. She reminded me of how everything I want can STILL happen. I just need to get back up and dust myself off.

WAKE UP CALL #2--The Journal Entry
The very opening of this blog (the part in quotes) was written in September 2009, when I weighed the heaviest I ever have. What I weigh now. And suddenly re-reading my journals from those times made me realize that I feel that way again. And it has reminded me that feeling this way absolutely SUCKS!!! It has reminded me of what I want to achieve, where I want to go.


SO, where do I go after these 2 ginormous wake-up calls?!?!? Well I have some good news already: I have started weight-training again and I am now 2 weeks into it. I have also started training long distance running and I am tring to build up to doing 2 miles in under 20 minutes. Right now I can do 1 mile in about 9:30 so I am getting there. However, I am still struggling with some aspects of my health regimen. I really need to focus more on my eating habits. As of late, they aren't too good because I am still eating junk here and there and I have "cheat days" a little too frequently.

I know this blog is getting really really long and let me just thank you for reading this if you took the time :)

I will wrap things up on a positive note. I want to share with you my first set of goals:

1) Keep working out consistently.
2) Start/maintain a food journal.
3) Eat 1300-1500 calories a day of healthy food.
4) Lose 15 lbs by September 27th
*5) Run 2 miles in under 20 minutes by September 20th
*6) In 2 minutes, do at least 15 quality push-ups
*7) in 2 minutes, complete at least 50 quality sit-ups

I feel like I am off to a pretty decent start already on each of my goals and I want to only get closer to each as I move forward.

One more thing, I promise to blog more often to get advice from you all as well as comment on your posts as well. I've been gone for too long and this place really really helped me out before. I want to get back to that :)

Thanks again for reading this if you did. I am looking forward to hearing from everyone :) :)